| Time is an interesting thing. Back when I was in college, I had all the time in the world. I was drunk with time. I could do things, write things, create things, and in a bitter twist of irony a majority of my time was spend enjoying the simplicity of doing nothing whenever possible. This isn't to say that I'm making the presumption that such a behavior is unique to those within the college demographic. And, of course, I'm making an unfair summary of my affairs. But, ultimately, if asked off the cuff to recollect on what I feel I miss the most about that period, I think the simple task of savioring moments of silence would be at the top of my list. I look at all the things I value then, and all the things I value now, and I know again that it is completely normal for these values to change based upon the currents of time and what they bring to me. In addition, I craft that flow with the choice I make, regretting I suppose that I can only make one on occassion. In a very immediate affirmation, however, I am not a man with regrets. I merely love the tree's branches, and wish I could see them all purely as an observer rather than a participant with rather monopic vision. As it stands, I have been remiss in writing here, and I do not believe it because I have had very little to say. I believe that it was because I was unconsciously finding things to get in my way. Granted, it's not very hard to fill what little freetime I do have. However, the simple act of forming the old routine was somehow alien to me now, and I did not make the extra effort to make it back again. To the Xanga veterans in the audience, I can only laugh at how the Internet has caught up to us and then passed us. Remember when our personal pages of reflection were so unique, and when people valued the content displayed on them? Now personal pages are the rage, from MySpace to Facebook (of which I have finally joined both this year under peer pressure.) Theses newcomers value instant gratification and networking with little value, in my eyes, placed on actual sharing of thoughts and discourse. As someone who found his wife through this very medium of the Xanga community, I can only shake my head and shrug. However, I must admit that I am glad to see that Xanga is still alive and strong. While I am certain many of whom I have crossed paths with have left me for dead, I assure you again, as I am known to do each time I resurface, that I am very much alive. I'm making a concerted effort to return to writing; to composition. I've been given a few opportunities where I think I may be able to put my thoughts down again in careful analysis, but I could never do that without in good cheer do the same here: this journal (I guess we call them blogs now, don't we?), this fulcrum of my life over the last several years. I haven't even bothered to spellcheck this or check it for any other kind of literary foible. I want this to be a true return, after a fashion. A true transmission, if you will, to this old portal. I hope you all are well, and that you are writing, and creating, and sharing. I will definitely see you again soon. |
